One of my dad's favorites.
The preacher has chosen to preach on the need to have no enemies and goes on, quoting this scripture and that to bring his point home. He's well into his surgery and the need to make friends with everyone and to helps his point get across the thunders across the congregation "I need to know if there is anyone here in this family of friends that can honestly say they have no enemies, I need to have some one rise to their feet and tell us how they have come to the point in their life that all around them are friends, that hey have no one they hate. I need that person to rise to their feet and teach us all how it is done." WAY in the back old brother Jones rises to his feet (takes a couple of moments to get there, I did say OLD brother Jones) and he says "Reverend, I ain't got no enemies."
"WONDERFUL, brother Jones, tell us all how you did that"
"I OUTLIVED THEM ALL"
Don't think that was what the Rev was after.
LL
Target golfing
Robert's wanted to do this for awhile
Sunday, August 12, 2012
Another joke came to mind.
Dr. Christian Bernard, who pioneered heart replacement surgery told this one on himself, and it's one of my favorites.
When you open a patient up to replace a heart, you only have about 6 hours to get the new heart in and wasting no time is critical. As he was getting ready to install a new heart, he put his hand out of the "cat-gut" It's what they still call surgical suture material, I understand it really was cat intestine years ago (Let us sing praises for better technology) and was handed a "wad" of knots. Not happy at all he starts "attacking" the wad to untangle it, muttering $#@@%& under his breath. His surgical nurse asks. "may I help? Doctor" to which he replies " NO THANK YOU. I've been a surgeon for 20 years, I ought to be able to do this" and back to "#@%$^&#$#" A moment later the surgery nurse gentle takes it from his hand and twists that and tugs that and the whole mess untangles in her hand. She smiles and hands it back and he asks, no to politely "HOW DID YOU DO THAT?" She replies "I've been doing embroidery for 40 years"
Dr. Christian Bernard, who pioneered heart replacement surgery told this one on himself, and it's one of my favorites.
When you open a patient up to replace a heart, you only have about 6 hours to get the new heart in and wasting no time is critical. As he was getting ready to install a new heart, he put his hand out of the "cat-gut" It's what they still call surgical suture material, I understand it really was cat intestine years ago (Let us sing praises for better technology) and was handed a "wad" of knots. Not happy at all he starts "attacking" the wad to untangle it, muttering $#@@%& under his breath. His surgical nurse asks. "may I help? Doctor" to which he replies " NO THANK YOU. I've been a surgeon for 20 years, I ought to be able to do this" and back to "#@%$^&#$#" A moment later the surgery nurse gentle takes it from his hand and twists that and tugs that and the whole mess untangles in her hand. She smiles and hands it back and he asks, no to politely "HOW DID YOU DO THAT?" She replies "I've been doing embroidery for 40 years"
Sunday, August 5, 2012
Cruising the web one day. I cannot believe what I found http://www.twirlgoround.com/
My parents bought one of the ages ago. We called in the Whirley-gig. We only had the two man version, but oh my the hours we spend on it. It was blue and red and got rusty as the years went by, but we rode it to death. I don't recall any of us hurling on it, but I believe one of the cousins or two did. They don't make an adult version, yet. Can't help thinking it would a great exercise and gotta wonder if you could use it to generate power. It's nice to have a childhood memory my sibs havn't tainted.
My parents bought one of the ages ago. We called in the Whirley-gig. We only had the two man version, but oh my the hours we spend on it. It was blue and red and got rusty as the years went by, but we rode it to death. I don't recall any of us hurling on it, but I believe one of the cousins or two did. They don't make an adult version, yet. Can't help thinking it would a great exercise and gotta wonder if you could use it to generate power. It's nice to have a childhood memory my sibs havn't tainted.
Saturday, July 21, 2012
pai
I'M OK,so why don't I feel ok. My husband has been in hospitals 3 Thursdays running.First was to remove the 3rd bladder tumor he' had in 4 years. He spent 1 hour with his bladder full of chemo. I couldn't be there.My stupid job hadn't hit the year mark and if I had taken a day off, I could have been fired. And I'm carrying the health insurance for us. Luckily, Le & Ly were able to be there for him. The following Thursday he finally had that Dmmmm carcinod removed from his sinus. It's been there for years apparently, the Dr's term was "grossly deviated septum" It was over 5cm but it must be benign, as a week & 1/2 later the "tumor panel" cannot decided if it's enough threat to need a follow-up chemo or radiation. We know that radiation will cause cataracts 2 1/2 years later, we are going to tell the Dr, "No Thanks" Because of the 2 surgeries a week apart, R was on heavy duty pain killers for 2 weeks running and the third week we were in the emergency room. Robert was impacted, he was unable to pass ANYTHING. They cathed him, the cath didn't come out till the following Monday. Then they tried several concoctions as well as an enema and "digital manipulation" (that has nothing to do with a computer" Nothing was happening and they literally kicked us out of the hospital. We came home and I brewed him a cup of "Smooth Move" tea and an hour later "the dam" burst. I couldn't get him to take the tea earlier.You'd have to ask him why.
Meanwhile, Lo calls me the 2nd Thursday to tell me that she wouldn't be coming to see her dad. Her DH got tossed off his bike on the way to work, busted up his shoulder, he looked like hamburger on knee & elbows when I saw him a few days later. Then Jo announces he's lost his job. He has an offer now, but it's in SLC, that a long drive away from his family. Meanwhile, Le was 13 days over due when they decided to go for a birth. 2 painful exhausting days later she gives birth to a beautiful boy. Nearly an angel except for a repairable clef lip, Just the lip, but oh my his eyes are glorious. I've met his face before, but I can't decide if I'm looking at one of my sons or my father. Then my wonderful daughter-in-law takes a fall a work and totally crunches her wrist. A plate & 7 screws later, she's in a cast for 2 weeks and while I would have love to take their 2 year old off their hands, I'm too darn old to take her on with 3 other grandkidlings. I take the Saturday off to go to the Ren fair on a 90 degree day and my feet hurt so bad, but we had fun. I come home to find Ly w/ car troubles, and I can't help her at all. Prius is beyond anything I understand. I don't understand hybred. Meanwhile the LA saga continues. Those loons won't do what my parents expected us all to do. SHARE. FAIRLY. Everyone claims they did it all, no one will see we all had a hand. LU washed, I dried, Jo broke. Still at it. That was my foot that ended up with the steak knife sticking out of my big toe in Buena Park as I was unloading the ugly old dishwasher. Dad told the story many times about how I let the rototiller get away from me and that's why the back fence didn't fall during any earth quakes, and why I call the rototiller in my back yard, MY rototiller. I put up that mirrored wall in the living room. It was my knee cap that broke while we were taking wallpaper off the kitchen wall. I'll be decorating a daughters wedding cake, one more time, just like Mom taught me in her kitchen so that we could build a wedding cake for another wedding that we catered, and I never got paid for the hours I put into mom's "catering company" No, that was household money. The same household money that paid for mom's fancy diamond ring. How many Saturday's did I completely have the kitchen cleaned. And how many Saturday's did that kitchen look like a disaster area 6 hours later, and I still had to put 1 or 3 hours on the piano, depending upon the season. But, I only learned piano so I could play for church, or so dad said. Little did he know. How many walls did I paint. I know I did the living room at least twice. Weeds pulls? Truck loads, despite the rose thorns. I fed 5 kids, well, because Mom insisted I cook, how many chocolate applesauce cakes have I made? My daughters are making Chili Relish, with relish. I've got mom's recipes. Ro loves Dad bread stick recipe, makes the best pizza dough. No I'm not Ok, I feel abused, worn out, tired and very frustrated, and not a darn thing I can do about it.
Meanwhile, Lo calls me the 2nd Thursday to tell me that she wouldn't be coming to see her dad. Her DH got tossed off his bike on the way to work, busted up his shoulder, he looked like hamburger on knee & elbows when I saw him a few days later. Then Jo announces he's lost his job. He has an offer now, but it's in SLC, that a long drive away from his family. Meanwhile, Le was 13 days over due when they decided to go for a birth. 2 painful exhausting days later she gives birth to a beautiful boy. Nearly an angel except for a repairable clef lip, Just the lip, but oh my his eyes are glorious. I've met his face before, but I can't decide if I'm looking at one of my sons or my father. Then my wonderful daughter-in-law takes a fall a work and totally crunches her wrist. A plate & 7 screws later, she's in a cast for 2 weeks and while I would have love to take their 2 year old off their hands, I'm too darn old to take her on with 3 other grandkidlings. I take the Saturday off to go to the Ren fair on a 90 degree day and my feet hurt so bad, but we had fun. I come home to find Ly w/ car troubles, and I can't help her at all. Prius is beyond anything I understand. I don't understand hybred. Meanwhile the LA saga continues. Those loons won't do what my parents expected us all to do. SHARE. FAIRLY. Everyone claims they did it all, no one will see we all had a hand. LU washed, I dried, Jo broke. Still at it. That was my foot that ended up with the steak knife sticking out of my big toe in Buena Park as I was unloading the ugly old dishwasher. Dad told the story many times about how I let the rototiller get away from me and that's why the back fence didn't fall during any earth quakes, and why I call the rototiller in my back yard, MY rototiller. I put up that mirrored wall in the living room. It was my knee cap that broke while we were taking wallpaper off the kitchen wall. I'll be decorating a daughters wedding cake, one more time, just like Mom taught me in her kitchen so that we could build a wedding cake for another wedding that we catered, and I never got paid for the hours I put into mom's "catering company" No, that was household money. The same household money that paid for mom's fancy diamond ring. How many Saturday's did I completely have the kitchen cleaned. And how many Saturday's did that kitchen look like a disaster area 6 hours later, and I still had to put 1 or 3 hours on the piano, depending upon the season. But, I only learned piano so I could play for church, or so dad said. Little did he know. How many walls did I paint. I know I did the living room at least twice. Weeds pulls? Truck loads, despite the rose thorns. I fed 5 kids, well, because Mom insisted I cook, how many chocolate applesauce cakes have I made? My daughters are making Chili Relish, with relish. I've got mom's recipes. Ro loves Dad bread stick recipe, makes the best pizza dough. No I'm not Ok, I feel abused, worn out, tired and very frustrated, and not a darn thing I can do about it.
Sunday, July 15, 2012
Another Joke came to mind
Husband and wife are in a car, going down the road, and she's not happy.
"We used to sit together when we went any where. You used to put your arm around me and we'd listen to music and talk. Don't do that anymore." On and on she went and finally turned to him and said, "Don't you have anything to say?"
He took a moment and at a stop light, turned, looked at her and said "I havn't moved"
"We used to sit together when we went any where. You used to put your arm around me and we'd listen to music and talk. Don't do that anymore." On and on she went and finally turned to him and said, "Don't you have anything to say?"
He took a moment and at a stop light, turned, looked at her and said "I havn't moved"
Thursday, July 12, 2012
Word of Warning
IF ANYONE you know is on Vicodin, or other pain killers.MAKE THEM TAKE STOOL SOFTENERS, MAKE THEM DRINK, TAKE FLAX SEEDS, BRAN MUFFINS. Get their gut moving. I've just spent 5 hours in an emergency room watch my DH try and get ANYTHING to pass. It's not a pretty picture. It' ain't over, but the literally kicked us out, there was nothing more they could do. I'm so frustrated, I tried to all of the above. Harpy. Don't ever call your spouse that, even when your hurt. It still stings.
Sunday, July 8, 2012
Post Surgery
Post Surgery
It's called a Resection of anterior skull base tumor. Looked it up, NASTY. R's home and I can't tell if he's just in the grip of a pain killer lull or if he's in that bad of shape. He still has packing WAY up in a sinus, but can now breath out of both sides of his nose. How many years have we be fighting "allergies, irritations" etc? He's tired, hurts and just doesn't want to move, but weirdly enough is vision is better without his glasses????? He thinks he's going back to work in 2 week. Bet not. Lord give me patience.....all around.
It's called a Resection of anterior skull base tumor. Looked it up, NASTY. R's home and I can't tell if he's just in the grip of a pain killer lull or if he's in that bad of shape. He still has packing WAY up in a sinus, but can now breath out of both sides of his nose. How many years have we be fighting "allergies, irritations" etc? He's tired, hurts and just doesn't want to move, but weirdly enough is vision is better without his glasses????? He thinks he's going back to work in 2 week. Bet not. Lord give me patience.....all around.
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